DEPRESSED

(Written 23 of march)

So many demons or bad spirits or whatever you want to call them keep possessing me
Their relentless always in my face as they keep testing me
But I'm not a quitter I'll never give up oh no never
Somedays its like they win somedays they lose and my days are better
It's like a battle better yet it's a war getting worse as everyone tries to score
Somedays it's so confusing I shed tears but can't figure what I'm crying for
I can't say that each day I pray because I don't that would be a lie
But sometimes I do and when I do I pray that I would just die- why
Maybe the reason is I feel hated or unloved or maybe unwanted
The situations I go through I feel my life is no good cursed or haunted
Nobody cares and the ones who do can't do nothing for me but talk
I can't run through life so I just walk
I can't open new doors cause their closed with a chain and lock
I have a warm feeling in my chest that could have something to do with my heart
Maybe someone will shine some light in my life and get me out of the dark

Why I think

(Written 22 of march)

My thoughts never slow down never cease or give me a break
How much longer can I go on How much more can I take
I think about everything from love to hate to the events of the day
Every second to every minute to every hour how can I control my thoughts from going astray
Some say its a talent some say its a gift some say I think too much
Maybe its just my questions thats unanswered or my need for a loving touch
Give me a reason if there is one why my thoughts keep flowing
Could it be the urge to learn or the curiousity of never knowing
Give me a piece of paper and a pen and let me begin to write whats on my mind
Let me shock you with words and leave you in wonderment from every line
My mind controls my hand which controls the pen which controls the words I write
But what controls my brain that creates my dreams and thoughts that flow in the night
Again more questions with no answers which sometimes I hate and sometimes I love it
Because whatever happens in that second or minute or hour my mind takes off to think of it

God's Love

(written 3 of march 2011)

As I stand before ya'll I'm proud to be considered as a religious man
A faithful servant a hundred percent and one of God's biggest fans
I'm a changed man
It took me a couple of years to do it but I done did it man
I know that any other sinner can
If they can take out some time to understand
That God is the alpha- omega almighty and he has a plan
Something thats more better and beautiful than this bitter land
I was told that spoken words are stronger than the strongest man
A new adventure is starting filled with the sun,sea and sand
For in our thoughts and in our hearts our horizon starts to expand
As we find that passing time can somehow heal
But it's God's love that will ease the loss and sorrow that we sometimes feel
At times thats hard and you want to scream and curse
Don't fret because I bet
Things will change if you put God first

Stranger in a new place

(Written march 1 of 2011)

I'm no longer in the same place
I'm in a new scenery and around every corner there's a new face
Maybe there's a different way of living a different change in pace
How will this place turn out to be
Will I be accepted or rejected
I'll just have to wait and see
This place can be positive or negative
But it's where I choose to live
No matter what I do or where I choose to rome
Some people may call this the ghetto but it's what I call home
Just because it contains drugs and thugs I don't have any fear
The world isn't run by them so I know it's not ran by them here
Living in a new neighborhood I must confess I was afraid of what others thought
But after time and socializing- a wonderful community is what I got
A neighborhood becomes your home by what you give it
Who cares how it is it's how you live it

What's Wrong?

(Written February 23 of 2011)

Please lord forgive me for my life of sin
There's so much forgivness to ask for I don't know where to begin
How could it be through the misery that came to pass
My life of sin made it hard for me to ask
As I walk through the valley of death the devil follows me
He's always bumping into my life with no apology
We blinded and hypnotized
From struggling to survive
We taking each others lives
We drinking and smoking out
We playing it like a game
The government is who we blame
The ghetto's gonna stay the same
Unless we all wanna change

PULLED ME THROUGH

(Written January of 2011)

I took a day to search for God and found him not
Then suddenly all unaware
Far off in the deep shadows somewhere
I heard his voice upon the air
I know he hasn't left me but I feel so alone
I'm a big boy now but I'm still not grown
Satan I rebuke you for what I go through
And trying to pursuade me to do what I used to
But all that stops right here
As long as the lords in my life I shall have no fear
I should of known from the start
It feels right in my heart
My minds messeage has been sent
Telling me to turn away just repent
Away from the deadly serpent
But he's always in my face
Never giving any space
Trying to put me in his place
Constantly in a chase
For my soul at times I wanna cry
Lord come and save me
Look at all the gifts that he gave me
Now he's trying to pusuade me
And every single time that I try and do right
He's like a thief in the night
Popping up with out a clue
Giving me a decision to a deadly collision away from you
Lord I need your helping hand so you can pull me through

MY PRAYER

(Written 15 of February 2011)

Help me read between the lines
So my eyes may focus and clearly see the signs
Rest your hand upon me and guide me
Bless me with a hedge of protection so you don't need to hide me
Show me your love and teach me your ways
May your light shine on me for the rest of my days
Smile and bless us all as you hear our praise
And we know that by staying connected
That we are always being protected
I'll never deny what you can do for me
Cause I may not be what I think I should be
But I thank you God I'm not who I used to be